


All Alone with You

by ThatWouldBee_Enough



Series: Kinktober 2020 [8]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Kinktober, M/M, Masturbation, Non-Consensual Voyeurism, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:07:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26919331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatWouldBee_Enough/pseuds/ThatWouldBee_Enough
Summary: James has a huge crush on his best friend. He's too afraid to tell him, but he can't help the noises he hears through the walls when Thomas comes home late with someone. (alternative title Oh My God, They Were Roommates)-------------------Prompt #8 - Voyeurism - jeffmads
Relationships: Thomas Jefferson/James Madison
Series: Kinktober 2020 [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947364
Comments: 12
Kudos: 29





	All Alone with You

James and Thomas have been living together for five years. 

When Thomas had asked James just after graduation if he wanted to split the rent on a place near DC, he had agreed without a second thought. After all, cost of living in the area is high and Thomas is his best friend. James knew he’d be a reliable roommate, certainly better than some random stranger. It was only logical that he’d say yes to such a convenient arrangement. 

He had pushed away the ridiculous notion in his mind that he was only doing this as a way to keep Thomas close. 

After all, if he hadn’t realized James’s affection for him after four years at school, he would surely _never_ put the pieces together. And that suited James just fine because Thomas remaining oblivious is better than the alternative. Rejection and heartbreak and fallout. But just because James is fine with pining from a distance doesn’t mean that he never fantasizes about how it would feel if Thomas ever _did_ fall in love with him. It can’t hurt to let his mind wander. 

Every time Thomas comes home late with someone, James is already in his bedroom, door shut, lights out. Thomas thinks he’s asleep, but it’s never the truth. James can’t get his mind to shut down when he’s thinking about his friend out at a bar or a club with someone else, flirting and dancing and fixing his sights on his latest challenge. He can’t sleep knowing that he’ll never work up the courage to just ask Thomas out himself. 

When Thomas does bring someone home, there’s always shushing on the way through the living room. “My roommate’s a heavy sleeper,” he usually hears through the walls. Because when Thomas has asked if he’s too loud or if the noise ever wakes him, James always assures him that, no, he was fast asleep. 

The first time he overheard Thomas with someone else, James felt a sharp stab of jealousy that was nearly crippling. He had laid in his bed, pillow hugged tight to his chest, trying to shut out the noise. But the louder Thomas got– and he could get _very_ loud– the harder it was to ignore. The guilt ate away at him when he noticed his body reacting to the image of Thomas in his mind. Matching his imagination with the very real sounds from the other room. He went to bed hard and frustrated and impossibly ashamed that night. 

But he can’t be expected to ignore these urges every time Thomas brings someone home. 

Over time he actually starts to look forward to the nights when Thomas goes out looking for someone. He may not ever find himself in Thomas’s bed, but at least he can listen to his moans and cries of pleasure and the gasped out praises. James occasionally pretends they’re meant for him as he listens attentively through the walls. A few times he’s even snuck out to the bathroom right after Thomas is done so that he can pretend at accidentally running into him in the hall. It’s a special treat to see Thomas relaxed and blissed out post sex, his hair a mess, blood still warm in his face from the exertion. James files these images away in a deep, cherished corner of his mind. 

Tonight has been an especially late night. James retired to his own room hours ago, the lights off, but his laptop still cracked open, the keyboard lit up so he can see what he’s typing as he tries to get some work done. All of that focus goes out the window though when he hears the door open– a little too loudly given the hour– and then a drunken giggle and shushing. James closes his laptop slowly, making sure to be as silent as possible when he slides it over onto his nightstand. He carefully maneuvers under the covers as he hears the unmistakable sounds of people moving about in the kitchen and then the living room. He can hear the moment they retreat to the privacy of Thomas’s room. 

Well– maybe privacy isn’t the best word. The stab of guilt is sharp, but it’s quickly replaced with anticipation. He can already feel himself stirring, knowing what’s about to happen, and he hates himself for it a tiny bit. Not enough to stop though. No, never enough to stop. 

He doesn’t focus on the guilt for long. He can hear Thomas drop down onto the bed, a soft thud that has become far too recognizable. He hears a few muttered words, but they’re not clear enough to make out. For the best, he thinks. If he can’t hear the exact words, they won’t shatter the illusion. James can already feel his body churning to life, the electric buzz pulsing under his skin, but he doesn’t lay a hand on himself until the first moan reaches his ears. 

He closes his eyes now, letting his mind drift to Thomas. All the times he’s laid eyes on him shirtless, lazy mornings at home or trips to the beach with their friends. That smooth skin over toned muscles. The way his eyes sparkle when he’s passionate about something. The cadence of his voice. That gorgeous voice that suddenly lets out a low, enthusiastic groan. He wants to mirror the noise, the sensation is so good, so intense as he strokes himself in time to memories of his best friend, but he swallows the impulse down. He’s never given himself away in all the years that he’s indulged in this, and he’s not about to slip up _now_. 

His hand speeds as he listens to the action. Can hear the moment Thomas slips inside, the responding moan from his partner. Thomas himself curses and groans out a praise. It’s a response James has memorized. He replays it sometimes when he’s lying here by himself, but in his mind it’s _him_ underneath Thomas on the mattress. His own tight body that Thomas is pushing inside. He wonders what words of encouragement Thomas would provide for him. If he’d tell him how good he felt. Tell him he was perfect… 

He feels his thighs clench as the pressure in his groin builds slowly towards that edge he’s looking for. He knows from experience once he gets there he can balance on the precipice and save himself for the moment Thomas comes. It always feels so much better when they finish together. 

Thomas is louder now. His grunts and moans ring through the walls in time with the rhythmic pounding of the bed. A symphony of unrestrained noises that James will cherish for days to come. When he squeezes his eyes shut tighter, he can imagine crushing his lips to Thomas’s, drinking in those sounds of bliss and putting all of his years of longing into the kiss so that Thomas can’t help but fall in love with him as well. He can tell when the end is nearing. Thomas’s repeated “Oh god, oh god, oh god” is unmistakable through the wall. James grabs a tissue from the box on the nightstand and then doubles the pace of his strokes, climbing closer and closer. He’s always been glad that Thomas isn’t one to scream his partner’s name in bed. It makes it so much easier to keep the fantasy alive. 

He can see Thomas’s lips parting as the words cut off and he stills, all the way inside of him. Can practically feel the pulse of his cock as he comes, hot and deep and perfectly intimate. 

He allows the thought to carry him over the edge as he spills into the tissue. 

As he drifts down from his orgasm, he lets his imagination continue the narrative for a little longer. The look on Thomas’s face as he leans down, still inside of him, and presses a lingering kiss to his lips. The way he would run a hand along the side of his face and stare into his eyes and tell him he was wonderful, so incredibly perfect. That he didn’t want anyone else. That he was more than enough. 

The illusion is shattered in an instant when he hears the two of them talking in the other room, no longer passionate and intense. Just casual conversation as they get out of bed and clean up. He hears someone leave the room, then the bathroom door closing, the shower stuttering to life. 

He lays in bed a moment longer, catching his breath and feeling his heart rate return to near normal. Then he carefully gets to his feet, tosses the tissue, and leans his back heavily against the wall that separates him from Thomas’s room. Just a wall, and yet the distance between them feels endless. 

**Author's Note:**

> If you leave a comment I automatically like you 100x more than most people 
> 
> I'm over on tumblr @ilovefoodandgirls


End file.
